★ 28 [Video] This was not the way I planned

[mightbeconcussed]

[Lucy is sitting in the apartment she shares with the Master. There's a couples of pints of ice cream on the coffee table and a bottle of Bailys. She's got her legs crossed and her feet are bare. Her hair is braided into pigtails and she's beaming at the video]

PENNY!

It's ME and I am irrevocably--yes I know what it means--absolutely and completely in love with you. I can't live another day without you. I thought you could move into Harry's place with us and use the stripper pole.

Please?

And I am sacrificing two whole pints of ice cream in your name.



Harry, I'm not really in love with Penny. Chris feels bad because he's gay and loves Ray and Ray is running around screaming he's not an arse bandit--what IS that even? Is it an English thing? ANYWAY just thought you should know. I still like you. The Penny thing is for distraction.



[ooc: Lucy isn't cursed at all. She's just insane and trying to make Chris feel better]

Comments

[Private/Unhackable]

[neverendingbeat.livejournal.com]

[OH SHOOSH, LUCY, THIS IS HYSTERICAL.]

How very kind of you. I'm not entirely certain what it's meant to ENTAIL but I do know "arse bandit" is a British derogatory term for a gay man.

So, how exactly is this meant to help?

Re: [Private/Unhackable]

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

[She's pleased to entertain]

Because Chris isn't the only gay one confessing his love to someone straight of course! Solidarity for gay people! Even if I'm just pretending today.

[Private/Unhackable]

[neverendingbeat.livejournal.com]

I see. And what happens when everyone finds out that you were just pretending?

Re: [Private/Unhackable]

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

I figure it's a curse. By midnight everyone is going to be saying 'MY BAD!' I'll just 'my bad' along with everyone else.

video;

[perspectiveguy.livejournal.com]

Aw, not you too! Declare your love to your non-committing boyfriend! And...get un-cursed!

Also, you don't know what an arse-bandit is?

Re: video;

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

My non-committing boyfriend knows how I feel--which by the way I'm the one who's non-committing he's very committed actually--I asked him if we could have a stripper pole in our house. Which we do. It doubles as a fire pole.

I do now! Harry told me.

[ageoftheg33k.livejournal.com]

[...He'll be in his bunk.]

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

[sends him made up fantasies to get him through. She's a device sext operator by day.]

[valentineluke.livejournal.com]

Are you joking about said pole?

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

Harry made it for me. It goes through both floors and has a retractable platform on the second floor so you can slide all the way down it to the first floor.

[valentineluke.livejournal.com]

Good to have in case of fire, I assume.

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

And for being sexy. Also for fun

[hidesinrestroom.livejournal.com]

[OKAY, NOW HE CAN'T KEEP QUIET ANYMORE]

How dare you talk to Penny like that.

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

What? I'm being flattering cause I'm in love with her. Duh. What's your damage?

[hidesinrestroom.livejournal.com]

Penny is more classy than some common hussy.

1/3 or so?

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

2/more than 3 idek I'll tell you done when she is

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

Not just yet

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

Okay DONE

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

Did you just call me a hussy?

Getting there

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

I am so sorry this is late!

[horrible-penny.livejournal.com]

What?

...Stripper pole?

[Brb, processing things.]

...This seems really sudden. I mean--I don't know what I mean. Wow.

No worries at all

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

I know. Live in threesome is a big step but I honestly think we're ready for it. I do not take commitment lightly Penny and the stripper pole is fun. Really

Thank you <3

[horrible-penny.livejournal.com]

Ready...? But none of us ever dated or... or expressed any kind of--I mean, there was that fake lesbian dance, but it was fake and I'm pretty sure Harry isn't interested, anyway...

Does stripping have to take place on the stripper pole?

Re: Thank you <3

[mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com]

Heeeeeeello. Harry's a boy. Of course he's interested.

Nope! In fact there's rarely nudity on the stripper pole. It's just fun to play with.

TIME TO BAIT THE ENGLISH

[disregard-death.livejournal.com]

In my experience, most of the English are a little on the arse chasin side anyway. Nothin' to be upset about.

An on a serious note. Maybe the lad just needs a few beers an a game of pool ta let it out.