mightbeconcussed: (saved me helped me grateful)
Lucy Locke ([personal profile] mightbeconcussed) wrote2010-06-15 04:08 pm

★ 21 [Text // Voice] She's the crackle of the static, she's the curses, she's the prayers Mor

[Private to the Deities || Unhackable via Harry's filters]



[TEXT]

So I know I act like this ditsy blonde idiot girl who's lived in a glass bubble her whole life. And to an extent it's true. The bubble part—okay if I'm honest the ditsy part too and the blonde is a duh because of course it's natural.

Getting back on track.

Pain is having your insides scraped out while you stare up at an acoustic ceiling and try to drown that sound out. There isn't enough valium in the world. Pain is knowing they're taking away parts of you and putting them in a biohazard bag but not caring because they're taking away parts of him too and if you could cut out all the parts of you that have been hurt by him your heart would be the first to go.

Because you can't live without your heart, pain is locking it up behind a wall of one night stands, alcohol and smiles that are too bright, too wide, too fake.

Pain is getting so used to being that girl that you don't know how to do anything else. It's meeting that guy that says the right things, does the right things and then lying awake at night taking bets on how long it'll be until he crushes you just because he can. It's wondering if you should just pack up and leave right now because this is a mistake. It has to be a mistake because pain is never considering that it might be anything else.

Pain is also once-a-month PMS, and cute new shoes that are a half size too small but they were on clearance so you bought them anyway but that's not really relevant to the whole thing.


[/private]

[VOICE]

I think the deities want us to be all emo all the time. Or maybe they're like the creepers who get their rocks off by hurting other people. Emotionally instead of physically but a lot of the curses do end in physical pain so maybe both ways.

ANYWAY that's enough talk about pain.

Harry's back which means I've been all big D grin girl and I have a new job working at Akindo. I love it but I have the feeling most of my paycheck will end up there instead of with me. At least I'll look good.

Now I'm going to walk the dog and get some coffee. No emo for me.

[identity profile] disregard-death.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 01:55 am (UTC)(link)
Oh good! Harry's back. Penny and I were thinking about shooting some pool, you two should come out.

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 02:42 am (UTC)(link)
Oh! Yay! That would be funny. Penny mentioned pool but needing a fourth. I'll ask him.

[Voice]

[identity profile] neverendingbeat.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 03:02 am (UTC)(link)
[Read it. Not mentioning it, even if he doesn't think she should be revealing so much to the deities. He's not sure how long it will be either. When he stops finding her amusing, probably, and needing her as a comfort blanket.]

If they wanted us to be emo all the time, they wouldn't make it rain cake, would they? I think they probably do what seems fun at the time.

I wouldn't worry too much about the paychecks. I'm not dead yet.

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 03:24 am (UTC)(link)
[At least they're both expecting it. Now it's just a matter of whether she waits around for it or not]

Okay. Well. Good point. Give me a second. I'm forming an argument.

It should rain zoloft and valium?

Okay that was my argument. Obviously I should be a lawyer.

Aww Harry! Was that an offer to be my sugar daddy? All sugar. No daddy.

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] neverendingbeat.livejournal.com 2010-06-18 06:17 am (UTC)(link)
It wouldn't affect me. I prefer the cake.

If you'd like it to be an offer, I'm willing to have made it.

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-18 07:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Good to know.

[She pauses because that more serious than she expected and right now she's trying not to hyperventilate, telling herself that he's joking. That's what they do. They joke. If he's serious then she has to be serious and then it is time to get the hell out of Dodge but she likes Dodge. And it's not like the City would let her go very far anyway. When she finally says something she sounds more flustered than she probably should. Lucy has never been good at hiding emotions outside of sadness]

I-I'll have to get back to you after I've read the fine print. Do we sign the contract in blood, ink, pencil or crayon?

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] neverendingbeat.livejournal.com 2010-06-21 07:08 am (UTC)(link)
Yes, I shouldn't become a junkie any time soon.

[The Master notices the fluster and is smiling on this end. That means it MATTERS.]

Blood's horribly unsanitary. So it depends. How erasable do you want the signatures to be?

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-21 04:24 pm (UTC)(link)
That's a good quality. Heroin addict is one of those qualities that only sound sexy. Sober is a lot sexier in reality.

[There's a slight pause where she's regaining her feet]

You're the sugar daddy. I think you're the one who gets to decide that. I sort of figure pencil. We're still in that 'I could possibly annoy you to death' stage but if you think you're satisfied with the level that I annoy you we could move up to washable crayon.

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] neverendingbeat.livejournal.com 2010-06-23 09:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Pencil crayon, then. Red. Tell me once you've had a chance to look the fine print over.

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-23 10:14 pm (UTC)(link)
You do realize that red is probably the hardest color to erase, wash or--Never mind. Yes you probably do. Okay. You'll be the first to know. Probably. I could discuss it with Penny first. Or even Menolly maybe even Keats but I'm not sure we're at that point in our relationship. Me and the girls plus Keats, not me and you.

[Nerves=ramble? Nooooo never!]

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] neverendingbeat.livejournal.com 2010-06-24 09:21 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm glad you have so many friends to consult about this. And I'm very patient, Lucy. I can wait.

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-24 11:13 pm (UTC)(link)
It's not so much a consultation as it is a sounding board for the freshness that is me. I don't usually do boyfriends for a reason. It sort of makes me hyperventilate if I think about it. It's not bad just--I'm a freak. Can't help it.

I know. The whole patience think is actually really hot. One of the reasons I'm still here. It's like infinite and uber appreciated.

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] neverendingbeat.livejournal.com 2010-06-27 06:43 pm (UTC)(link)
You're not a freak. Take all the time you need.

Re: [Voice]

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-29 11:31 pm (UTC)(link)
You're awesomesauce, Harry.

[identity profile] rumblelina.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 03:04 am (UTC)(link)
NOT rocks pebbles stones. I PREFER DI~AMONDS!

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
because diamonds are a girls best friend.

[identity profile] rumblelina.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 03:29 am (UTC)(link)
Not to mention delicious scrumptious savory.

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 04:00 am (UTC)(link)
Possibly hard on the teeth.

[identity profile] rumblelina.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 04:22 am (UTC)(link)
NOT MINE!

[identity profile] rockstar-otouto.livejournal.com 2010-06-16 05:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Emo... Isn't that the current trend in America?

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-17 07:10 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't know if I'd call it current. It's more like a few years ago but it's still sort of popular.

[identity profile] rockstar-otouto.livejournal.com 2010-06-18 12:58 am (UTC)(link)
I think I remember seeing it when I was studying abroad. Totally lame.

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-18 07:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Especially the whole culture. With the look and the attitude and yeah. Some of the music can be okay as long as you don't take it any further than that.

[identity profile] rockstar-otouto.livejournal.com 2010-06-19 02:07 am (UTC)(link)
Eh, I'll stick with my rock music.

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-20 12:57 am (UTC)(link)
Rock music is good to stick with. I like pop too though.

video

[identity profile] ageoftheg33k.livejournal.com 2010-06-17 06:06 pm (UTC)(link)
[It takes him awhile, and it might have been by pure luck or a mistake on her part, but Hardison finally cracks into Lucy's essay. And he kind of wishes he hadn't.]

Big D girl, huh? Did you get a boob job, or are we talking in netspeak again?

Re: video

[identity profile] mghtbconcussed.livejournal.com 2010-06-17 07:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Noooooo sort of netspeak. You know when you do a colon and a capital D to make a smiley face?

Oh look. Like this [And Hardison gets an extreme closeup video of Lucy smiling as wide as she can]